CHAPTER 9

As winter gave way to spring, I decided that it was time to start a painting business again. My brother Paul, still going to school in Fayetteville and ever in need of cash, was eager to join me. I had cards printed up that again bore the name "Artios Painters." This time the cards included both Paul's name and mine, with both our addresses and phone numbers. I knocked on doors until I found a little old lady who wanted her house painted and found my price reasonable. I quit my job at Polk Furniture and bought several buckets of paint.

Paul showed up chewing tobacco, spitting all over the little old lady's lawn and using the epithet "Jesus Christ" at every opportunity. This irked me enough to mention it to Matt, who was not only irked but incensed. He was furious at me, in the first place, for including Paul's name on the business cards. The business had been my initiative, my believing. I had found the house to paint. And I had put Paul's name on my business cards for what reason? Family loyalty? And now I was letting my brother take the name of God's son in vain and spit tobacco juice all over my customer's lawn?

What I should do, said Matt, was this. Paul was showing up every morning to pick me up for work, right? Right. Okay. Tomorrow, when Paul arrives to pick you up, Matt said, tell him that from now on, this business is going to be sanctified by God. From now on, this business is going to be blessed by prayer and believing, and from now on the two of you, Karl and Paul, are going to listen to a Sunday night teaching tape from The Way International before the start of every business day. Got that?

And I was to push the button on a one-hour teaching tape from The Way International, and we were to listen to that tape until its conclusion, and then, and only then, were we to drive off and start work at the property I had contracted to paint in the name of God and only God, and there was to be no taking of the Lord's name in vain and no spitting of tobacco juice on the customer's property. Understood?

And furthermore ... if Paul didn't like this plan (and Matt and I knew good and well he wouldn't), and if he were to leave before the tape was over (and Matt and I knew good and well he would), then:

"As he's heading down the stairs," Matt told me, "take the pack of business cards and say, 'Here, take your fucking business cards with you.' And throw the whole pack at him, like this." He demonstrated, flinging his hand out. "Got that?"

I wasn't in the business of questioning. I was apprentice Corps. My job was to do as I was told.

When Paul showed up the next day, I told him that from now on, this business was going to be sanctified by God. From now on, this business was going to be blessed by prayer and believing. And from now on, we were going to listen to a Sunday night teaching tape from The Way International before the start of every business day. Got that? I pushed the button. Paul sat still less than half a minute. "Sorry, gotta go," he said. He went to the door. I followed him, picking up the business cards on the way. He got down the first flight of stairs.

"Here," I said, "take your fucking business cards with you." And I threw the whole pack at him, 200 cards flying in all directions like a flock of pigeons taking off. He stared at me in shock, and quietly went on his way.

I've apologized to Paul for this incident a dozen times since leaving The Way. I feel like calling him up in Singapore right now and apologizing to him again. He must have thought I had completely lost my mind. But I was as sane as the guards at Auschwitz. I was just following orders.

© Karl Kahler 1999