CHAPTER 3

Andrea started at the stroke of 7, enthusiastically welcoming us to class. There were a couple of guidelines, other than being at every session on time, that she needed to discuss. One, we were not to take notes. Two, we were not to ask questions.

What? What kind of rules were those?

They were rules in the class coordinator's syllabus that spelled out how every PFAL class was to open. Of course they weren't presented as "rules," but they were presented as important. Note-taking would only distract us from listening. If we were busy writing down the last point, we would miss the next point. We could absorb far more by just listening than by listening and writing.

"Absorb" is the key word. The Way didn't want people to record, scrutinize, analyze. It wanted them to "absorb."

As for questions, we would be allowed to present any question in writing at the last session. "The class was designed to answer all your questions," Andrea said confidently, mouthing the instructions in her syllabus. Any question that came up in one session of the class would almost certainly be answered in a later session. If not, we could submit the question in writing at the end.

Presented that way, the rule seemed reasonable enough. But in practice, the rule against asking questions amounted to a prohibition against questioning the doctrine. If one student asks a question, the others might ask six more. Questions could turn into challenges, poisoning the whole atmosphere of the class. If no questions are allowed, the students have no way of challenging the material except to say flat-out that they don't buy it -- which never happens.

Nor do the new students remember their questions, write them down and hand them in at the end. There are no reminders before the last session. At the start of Session 12, the class coordinator simply asks if anyone has questions to turn in, and is almost always met by blank faces. "No? Great!" It's another triumphant moment. Of all the PFAL classes I ever attended, I remember only one instance in which a new student turned in a question at the end. It was answered privately, away from the ears of the others.

As Session 1 rolled, I had all my defenses in place, prepared to challenge every word Victor Paul Wierwille had to say. My greatest fear was that I would believe.

Conveniently, Dr. Wierwille taught on believing and fear in the very first session, quoting Job 3:25: "For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me." Believing equals receiving, he taught, and fear is believing. Fear is believing in reverse. Whatever you fear will come to pass just as surely as whatever you believe.

Oh, great.

The key was to get rid of the fear and believe.

© Karl Kahler 1999